The Imposter Syndrome: You are Not a Fraud

I didn’t publish my first book.

Why?

Well, someone laughed at me before delivering the speech that effectively sent my piece into an eternal long vacation in the digital thrash.

No need to launch into that hopeless story, but in summary, he said:

Ene, get a life. 😂

I have since published over 50 people across several regions, including the U.S, UK, Canada, the Caribbean and Ghana. But it was not without some internal struggle with self-doubt. I wrote this because I understand what it means to do something great and hide. After all, you do not wish to be one with your craft. Today, however, you must rise and salute the sun.

I Turned Down a TEDx Invitation

The Imposter Syndrome happens to us all…from the millionaire who doesn’t think he deserves that title to the doctor who saves a life and then hides in the operating room to avoid the accolades to you who has refused to tell us the great things you have done.

You are not alone. I also turned down my first-ever invitation to speak at a TEDx event.

Why?

I didn’t think I deserved it. What about my writing would make these people invite me to speak at such an event?

But I was wrong.

Still, I took the safer, inoffensive and conventional road, a.k.a my comfort zone, and gradually ushered myself out of the public eye. I created in private and was content with the reviews, but you see, where creativity is concerned, the art is not for you alone.

God does not create to hide; He creates to hide and then reveal at an appointed time. The ultimate end of everything hidden is revelation. Understand this. So, even your craft should only remain hidden for a while and not indefinitely.

I’m a behind-the-scenes achiever. I am more comfortable making things work without my face. This is why I avoid your video calls. If I can write it, I’d rather type it out than talk it out.

I am uncomfortable at public gatherings, especially those that require having to go through nerve-grating routines of meet and greet. Can we all exchange pleasantries from afar, please?

Thank you.

Understanding Imposter Syndrome

Imposter syndrome, also known as impostor phenomenon or fraud syndrome, is a psychological pattern where an individual doubts their accomplishments and fears being exposed as a “fraud” despite evidence of their competence and success.

People experiencing imposter syndrome often believe they have not earned their achievements, attributing them to luck or external factors rather than their skills and abilities.

The imposter syndrome comes in many forms:

1. It will tell you that you’re not better than anyone else.

2. Other times, it will say, “Everyone else is better than you.”

3. Sometimes, it takes you to court to convince you that you’re an introvert (like it’s something you should be proud of).

4. It reduces your confidence in what you can do.

5. Ultimately, it helps you help yourself shortchange yourself (I hope you understand my sentence).

Symptoms of Imposter Syndrome

Common characteristics of imposter syndrome include:

1. Persistent self-doubt: If you doubt your capabilities and feel inadequate, even when others recognize your achievements, you have imposter syndrome.
2. Overachieving: Do you work extremely hard to avoid being discovered as a “fraud” and constantly seek validation through accomplishments? If yes, ding dong! Imposter syndrome.
3. Fear of failure and perfectionism: Do you set extremely high standards for yourself, fearing that mistakes or setbacks will reveal your incompetence?
4. Attribution of success to external factors: Do you constantly downplay your role in your successes, attributing them to luck, timing, or help from others? This is not humility; it is imposter syndrome.
5. Fear of evaluation: If you avoid seeking feedback or evaluations for fear of negative judgments, then you may not be too far from imposter syndrome
6. Comparison: People with imposter syndrome often compare themselves to others and believe that everyone else is more competent and deserving of their success. If you do that, you’re an imposter!

Imposter Syndrome Vs. Low Self-Esteem

One reason the imposter syndrome is not often talked about is that many people confuse it with low self-esteem. At my core, I am confident, but when it is time to show up and show my work, I do not like to put myself out there because I may be doing the most.

Imposter syndrome is a psychological pattern where a person doubts their accomplishments and feels like a fraud, even when they are successful and capable. They believe their achievements are due to luck or outside factors, not their skills.

Low self-esteem, on the other hand, refers to a general and negative evaluation of oneself. Individuals with low self-esteem tend to have a negative self-image and may feel unworthy, incompetent, or unimportant. They often lack confidence in their abilities and may struggle with self-acceptance.

While low self-esteem and imposter syndrome border around feelings of inadequacy and self-doubts, imposter syndrome is a persistent disbelief in and the inability to embrace competence and achievements despite evidence of success.

Unlike people with low self-esteem, individuals with imposter syndrome do not think they are the runt of the litter; they are aware of their skill set, competence, and other valuable assets.

Winning the Imposter Syndrome War

There are many ways to address imposter syndrome, but I have limited this article to what I have practised or tested. This is not an exhaustive or professional list. It is based on experience. Ready?

1. Recognition and Acceptance

Change begins with truth. You cannot change what you do not truthfully confront. Acceptance here does not mean resigning yourself to the fate that life has dealt you where imposter syndrome is concerned. It is simply you agreeing that there is a problem that needs fixing. If you keep denying that you are alright, you won’t change the fact that you are self-sabotaging yourself.

2. Pray

As a believer, the word of God undergirds and underpins the framework that determines my reality and responses. If I find myself reacting or responding in a way that is contrary to what the Bible says, it means that another law is at work in me, and hence, I must superimpose it with a higher law.

For example, faith is superior to fear, so if I find out I am full of fear, I need faith to act or believe, regardless of my fears. Prayer is one great way to supercharge and pump yourself full of courage and confidence.

Prayer is also important because imposter syndrome is a mental war. You must fight it internally before your actions and reactions begin to look like heaven. You cannot be heaven on earth when you feel like hell inside.

When I teach writing, I begin by deconstructing faulty mindsets like only important people or celebrities ought to write. This is not true. Words are nobody’s private estate; you just need to make sure you have a message and then find those who consider you a big deal enough to listen to you.

3. Knowledge and Understanding

Most people stop at the realm of being aware of their capabilities regarding skillsets or delivering value. It is not enough to be aware of your skills and latent talents. You must know and understand it enough to transfer that knowledge or demonstrate it should the need arise.

For instance, I do not need external validation to know whether I can write; I know I can write, but when imposter syndrome knocks on my door, I must move from the realm of knowledge and demonstrate that I am a capable writer with practical perspectives.

This would entail showcasing the manifold wisdom I have mastered and can tangibly showcase where my craft, skill or talent is concerned. It is not enough to know something; how well do you understand it? How well have you mastered what you have understood about it? How easily can you teach it so it becomes knowledge for another person?

This is often where the fear comes in because we would inevitably fear what we claim to know but cannot demonstrate or teach when push comes to shove. Know your craft. Understand your craft. Master your craft. Teach your craft.

3. Accountability

Even after mastering your craft, imposter syndrome is a persistent bastard because the end goal is to render you immobile and hinder you from valuable contributing. It seizes your voice and relegates you to the background; This is not the will of God for you.

When you lose your voice, reach out to tested and trusted people. Tell them how you feel and what this feeling is making you do. I have those people in my circle, and I thank God for them! Sometimes, they encourage me; other times, they rebuke me. However, they always lift me up and out of that dark place.

4. Courage

You will not always have external motivation. Sometimes you would have to get up and do the work of being both the preacher and the congregation. Decide and discipline yourself to commit to the instructions you have given yourself. Do the needful regardless of how you feel, think, or want to act.

5. Seek Professional Help

You can begin with books like these recommendations from Goodreads and Better Up. I recommend Show Your Work by Jason Fried and David Hansson, Girl Wash Your Face by Rachael Hollis, and Mindset by Carol Dweck.

You can also consider seeing a therapist but search for someone credible and certified to treat mental health and behavioural issues.

On a Final Note…

The imposter syndrome is not your friend. It is your mind’s subconscious attempt to shield you from the pain of failure and the discomfort of leaving your comfort zone. It sets you up to become the weapon fashioned against yourself that hinders your prosperity.

Today, what exactly will you do about receiving everybody’s accolades except the one meant for you? In life, you’re stuck with just one option: YOU! The earlier you realize that, the better for all of us that have been waiting for your unveiling.

P.S.: You’re not an imposter.

Please share this article with someone incredibly good at what they do but hate to show their work!